Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Romancing The Gods

Romancing the Gods 

Ed Decker
 July 19th, 2011

I was going through my old books the other day and came upon a small book, Gods, Sex and The Saints, by George B. Arbaugh, dated 1957.  The title was enough to get me into the book and I skimmed through Chapter Two, The Romance of The Gods. Interesting to say the least.

 Of course, it dealt with the doctrine of Plural Marriage and eternal procreation in the Celestial Kingdom, for all worthy Mormons… 

Let me give you my one-minute lecture on this doctrine, often referred to as
“The Law of Eternal Progression.

LDS doctrine teaches that we were all born as spirit children in our pre-existent life on a planet near the great star, Kolob.  Mormonism teaches that the god of this world, Elohim,  was once a man on some other planet, earned godhood, was exalted and with many goddess wives, sent to his heavenly orb, where through sexual union, he and his goddess wives have been busy procreating enough spirit children to people this earth, over which he exercises his godhood authority.

 Worthy LDS men and women, through obedience to all the laws and ordinances of the LDS gospel and through vows and sacred rituals in the LDS temple, learn the sacred words, handgrips and  ‘passwords’ needed to enter into Celestial glory and begin the same process for their own planet. That is a pretty simple explanation for the core of Mormon theology and religious practice.

 If you want specific LDS proof documentation, go to my website  and look at the articles, Do They Really Believe that? And The Law of Eternal Progression.

Back to the Subject at Hand

 Yesterday, I was reading a newsletter published by the Home Owners’ Association at the development where we live.  In it was a little section of “Interesting Facts.”  It was quoting an article the writer read in a recent issue of National Geographics.

 The article estimated that about 108 billion people have lived on the earth since the Stone Age. In another article I received by e-mail recently, the author estimated that it was about 10,000 years ago when the population began doubling. 

 From those figures, I stepped into the estimating game and came up with an amount that seems far more modest and is less than half the National Geographic figure.

OK. This is where I wanted to take you.  Now let us do a little Math.

 Let us say that Elohim and his wives have already procreated 50 billions spirit babies and sent them down to earth to gain bodies and earn godhood through the obedience to the Laws and Ordinances of the Mormon Gospel. 

 Ooops. Most were born before these Laws and Ordinances were available to test these people. Elohim sure goofed on that one.  Well, Thank Elohim for his catch-up doctrine of Baptism for the Dead.

 Because I am going to have many emails come in telling me that I did not account for Creationism or the flood, I am going to cut that obviously questionable number of people who have lived on the earth down to half and just deal with 25 Billions of people who have, to date, lived on the earth. Forget the National Geographic figure of 108 Billion for now. What do those people know, anyway?

What Kind of God Am I?

 To procreate that many spirit babies, Elohim would have to impregnate one goddess wife per minute for over 17 million days, nonstop. Or, if he was also working at being the operative god of mankind here on earth and only impregnated one goddess wife every ten minutes, it would take him 170 million days.  So many spirit babies running around. Must be a day-care nightmare. Especially since they have ‘form’ but no bodies yet.

 Mormon leaders, in the past, have stated that the pregnancy time in the Celestial Kingdom is about the same as earth. I have trouble with that, since the goddesses are carrying spirit babies, same in form, but without bodies, so I am going to take license here and opine that such an easier pregnancy is just a 6 months deal up there in Celestialville.

Where are you taking us, Ed?

 Ok. I have all the pieces together now for my outstanding conclusion. The fellows at National Geographic and the author of the Newsletter article gave estimates of how many people are being born on earth each year right now.  I am going to work with the lesser figure of 140 million.

 There are 3,153,600 seconds in a year. To produce that many spirit babies in a year, Elohim, in his powerful godhood, would have to complete approximately 4.5 [four and a half] sexual unions per second to keep up with the demand for spirit babies. Moreover, he must do that without falling over his scrambling goddesses as they swirled around him. Remember, Elohim and his goddesses have bodies of flesh and blood.  Real people.

 So much for taking care of any business as god of the earth. One might as well be praying to a stone for all the attention a prayer would have to get this guy’s attention. I wonder when he gets to eat or sleep.. no time for  it.

The Overbearing Goddesses of Mormonism

If we look at this from the Mormon goddess viewpoint, and use the two spirit babies/per year yardstick, we come up with this unfathomable fact. 

If 140 Million spirit babies are cycling through the Celestial day-care system per year right now and if we can agree that each goddess is giving birth to and nurturing  two babies per year, then  it requires 70 million
worthy Mormon goddesses to handle the twice a year,  5th of a second  encounters with the exalted hubby and the resulting child-rearing.


Let’s Get Real

 We have no clue on how many wives Elohim took with him to that planet near the great star Kolob, but here on earth, there have not been a total of 70 million Mormons to date since Joseph Smith restored this gospel of eternal sex, as Granny Geer used to call it.

 If Elohim’s home planet was actually big enough to produce that many goddesses for every worthy exalted man-god, than his earth was a whole lot different from this one he was given to exercise his godhood over.
  
Let's get real here. This is beyond absurd! This is  beyond idiotic. This is so far beyond human logic and intelligence that to accept this fable,  contrived by the vain imaginations of depraved leaders is to deny Christ and the reality of truth within God's Holy Word. It is beyond an anti-Christ spirit. It is the degenerate act of self-worship.  

Dear heavens, Mormons! Wake Up! 

These are not the doctrines of God,
but the very doctrines of demonized men who are
leading a whole people to a hell bound eternity

 The Bible Says

2 Tim 4:3, 4
           For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine, but according to their own  desires, because they have itching ears, they will heap up for themselves teachers; and they will turn their ears away from the truth,
and be turned aside to fables
.  

 1 Tim 1:3-4
           As I urged you when I went into Macedonia-- remain in Ephesus that you may charge some that they teach  no other doctrine, nor give heed to fables and endless  genealogies, which cause disputes rather than godly 

1 Tim 4:1
           Now the Spirit expressly says that in latter times some will depart from the faith, giving heed to deceiving spirits and doctrines of demons,

 The Mormons who live this lie Are without Excuse 

Because that, when they knew God, they glorified him not as God, neither were thankful;
but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened.
 
Professing themselves to be wise, they became fools
And changed the glory of the uncorruptible God into an image made like to corruptible man,
and to birds, and fourfooted beasts, and creeping things. 
Wherefore God also gave them up to uncleanness through the lusts of their own hearts,
to dishonour their own bodies between themselves: 

Who changed the truth of God into a lie, and worshipped
and served the creature more than the Creator
,
who is blessed for ever. Amen. Rom 1:20-25  
  
 2 Cor 11:13-15 
For such are false apostles, deceitful workers, transforming themselves into apostles of Christ.
And no wonder! For Satan himself transforms himself into an angel of light.
Therefore it is no great thing if his ministers also transform themselves into 
ministers of righteousness,
whose end will be according to their works.

Contact Ed at  ed@saintsalive.com